Samuel says hi.

January 13, 2010 at 21:32 (General)

Bloody hell. He is annoying. Samuel I mean. He wanted me to introduce him. However, I gave him the privilage to introduce himself.

“My name is Samuel and I am a vampire. You can probably easily imagine an immortal, handsome half-god with shiny fangs. Yeah, that is how I like to think of myself from time to time. Unfortunately, the whole change is way overrated. Twenty years ago, when I have been changed, I was already forty years old, I have been working as an accountant in a small company and I have been married to the same woman for ten years. And the change did nothing to my life.

Well that’s not entirely true.

For 15 years now, I have been a chain smoker. If I knew it will end like this I would not feed on the damn smokers, but they are so slow. They are a temptation hard to resist if you know what I mean. Well, probably you don’t. .

Half of my silly income is spent on cigarettes. You would think such things should not happen to vampires. Yeah, right. I thought so too, by the way.

Before the change I was not a sportsman type. You could say I was a couch potato. After I became a vampire I didn’t get any super powers, and that is so damn not funny. As I said, the change is overrated. I did get something, however, and that something was lust for blood. Lust that cannot be tamed. Nowadays, I feed on those that aren’t fast enough to run from me.  Ok, granted  it does not feel nice to feed on all those fatties whose only ‘fuel’ is supersized MacDonald’s meal times ten. At least when I see one, as he tries to escape on his flabby legs, I get to feel a wee bit better about myself.

You can say I am an error. The great failure of the vampire world. I survived the meeting with my ‘maker’ accidentally. Instead of obediently dying, I became one of them. Damaged goods, but hey, still a vampire.

At first it escaped my attention. No wonder, as my body did not change. Sure, I did have my suspicions. After all, not every day you get bitten and not to mention almost killed on your way home. And it is a rather unusual sight to see someone escape by literally flying on top of the roof.

The thought that it might not have been a human kept nagging at the back of my mind. However, after I returned home from the police station, where I have been stared at as if I was a serious nut case, I decided that I must have seen things.

The truth hit me hard on the head three days after that fatal night, while I was going to work, right in the middle of the staircase of the block of flats I lived in. You see my neighbor next door was a hot babe. The best sort, I must tell you. Every other day I would be staring  at her boobs. She was always exposing them, damn the blouses she used to wear. This time, however, all I could see was her neck, and I felt the desire to bite her. Not that such thoughts never crossed my mind before. However, this time, there was nothing erotic about it. This time I wanted to suck her dry, and dump her body somewhere, where it would rot away.

Never in my life have I ran so fast.

Soon I realized that the only thing I could do was to accept my fate and the unexpected change in my life. The was no other option, not even death. And even if I could die I had no intentions to do so, although technically speaking, I was already dead. But I could have easily passed for a living person. Truth to be told, I always head a bit of a sickly appearance. Well, no change there. And I could swear that my heart was still beating. So much for the freaking legends. All lies I tell you.

The hardest thing in being a vampire was that I craved for blood, and I had no idea  how to get it.

The hunger was unbearable. And yet, I could not just go about attacking innocent people and sucking all their blood out. Till the last delicious drop… oh god, let’s not go there.

By no means was I disturbed by the idea of killing innocent people. Hey, I could hardly be  blamed for what I become, and for being true to my new nature.  It was something else that was stopping me. It was the fear of failure. I was afraid of getting caught.

I was already well aware that the change did not make me invincible.

I had to take into account the possibility of becoming a victim myself. You know, beaten into a bloody pulp and left in a gutter. No, thank you.

I had to think of a better plan.

Those days, boy I’ll sure never forget.

And actually, it’s a funny story. Well funny and gruesome. You would be surprised how these two concepts mix wonderfully in the vampire world.

Let me tell you the story.”

Oh, no you won’t. That is as far as you go.

After that I have robbed him of his voice. You see what I mean, when I say that he is no storyteller.

He speaks a bit like me, and yet he is not me.

It’s like walking a thin line.

I will post some insights on how I get my job (dancing on a tightrope) done. Maybe you will find it interesting :).


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